I am Generalizing here,
It is true that the Game/Sim is able to be "used" in many different ways, as in real life.
In real life some of the highest scoring (planes shot down, not humans) pilots ONLY engaged in Combat if they absolutely knew they would win (Red Baron, Eric Hartman, John Meyer).
The effect of that dictum in real life was that they (examples above) speak about waiting for friends to come, moving away or running away until the enemy is not strong, never turning ever, etc, etc.
Most of these survived, some did not.
In real life some of the highest scoring pilots begged for battle, all battle, any battle. They craved combat and often did not care about outcome at that moment.
The effect of that desire in real life was that they took on many of the enemy at once in bad situations doing feats of airmanship unknown. Often without thought. Most of these are dead. Some are not.
So the desire of the pilot, the goal or will of the pilot can/will change a set piece (War/Game/Sim/World) with expectations (rules/no rules) at all times everywhere.
Interpretation or manipulation of "the rules", or effects the rules is how life is. There is honor and there is not, there is aggression and there is not, there is combat and there is subversion. All are part of all.
So, I believe your idea of "Combat Flight Simulation" is the same as mine. For others it is other. How do I approach the things you have seen? I fight to destruction my enemy, unless I feel otherwise at that moment, because of a fight well fought, an enemy that cannot fight anymore or is incapable and deserves to land etc etc.
The "Game" tends to self rectify. If something is far out of whack then it (often slowly) corrects the issue. (as does most things in life, again albeit very slowly) If it does not then it is removed/replaced by something that is not out of whack. (we await that verdict)
An environment, ANY environment, has the Aggressive, the Passive, the Subversive, the Capable, the Incapable, etc. Balance in an environment is achieved for a time (or not) because of "The Players". Because of survival of the fittest, because of compassion, because of evil, because of mercy..... balance occurs and then disappears, then appears again.
In the environment one chooses, one chooses how to be in the environment.
I choose to KILL THEM ALL. For me this is combat. If I can find them, if I can catch them as they run........